Take Me out to the Ballgame

Today is Opening Day (home opener on 4/8) for the 2010 World Series Champion San Francisco Giants.  For those of you tired of hearing about it…too bad.  I love baseball.  Always have.  Even when my brothers were yelling at me to fetch them food because the Giants were on TV, I loved it.  It’s the game of life, you know?  Sacrifice a guy home.  Stealing.  You hit three out of ten and you’re an all-star.  Prepares you for life, blah, blah, blah.  In my house,  baseball/softball season means it’s a new opportunity to lose stuff.  Few sports can compete with baseball for the sheer amount of items you “need” to play.  The bag alone would need to be checked at the airport.  And if you have a teenage boy, good luck to you.  My son firmly believes he puts his stuff away and gets irritated with me if I question his “system,” which apparently is constructed around the songs on his iPod.  I wonder if Avenged Sevenfold is secretly telling him to leave his hat in the dugout everyday.  I would like to blame the mini-skirted Freshmen girls for all this but I cannot; there are too few of them strolling by the field.  I think the empty clutter of the male teenage brain is to blame and I’m frustrated.  These kids are smart.  I have evidence!  Just try and move my son’s cell phone an inch away from where he placed it; you may draw back a bloody stump!  He has managed to memorize every heavy metal song since the days of Robin Hood but he cannot remember where he put his mitt unless I tie it to him like a papoose.   My girls are better at keeping track, although one of them consistently boosts the other’s clean stuff; there will be payback soon.  Very soon.  There are even a few extra things with softball gear: personal emblazoned helmets, sliding pads.  It’s all a conspiracy.  Three guys in Barca loungers are sitting in front of ESPN right now, inventing stuff for me to buy.  I miss the days when all you really needed was a huge t-shirt with “Quickee Cleaners” on it and a pair of white polyester pants through which you could see the Power Rangers underwear.  I’d drive by the local park and see the volunteers putting up the home run fence and be excited for my little offspring, even though they didn’t really have a chance to hit one out; at that age they really were just excited about the gear and staring down a classmate on the mound.  But hey, the season begins today.  Let the Giants reign.


~ by alicetownsend on March 31, 2011.

One Response to “Take Me out to the Ballgame”

  1. What is this lame blog? Bwahahahaha

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